I Should Give My Mother A Bouquet of Kim Kardashians for Mother's Day

I'm sorry for being so absent and posting like a new Train song (every ten years) but it's the end of the semester and I don't have time or damns to give unless it's finals relevant. I had to report on the rachetness that was Monday's Costume Institute Gala at New York's Metropolitan Museum of Art. I know a mess, right. ESPECIALLY KIMBERLY KARDASHIAN'S DRESS!

Courtesy of Nicole Eggenberger of Us Magazine 

Kanye's baby's mother gave no types of damns. She gets that award this week. I want to clone eleven of her and wrap her and her clones in a bouquet and send them to my mother for Mother's Day. All that fabric that needed to wrap her body, I feel like I want to reupholster a couch with it. Did she reupholster that dress with the couch from Golden Girls? She wanted to look like a geriatric woman so she had to channel the spirits of Dorothy, Blanche and Sofia and wanted to show Betty White.

Who brought this dress for her? I think it was Kanye. You know why? Because Kanye would have thrown a fit at the gala if he was surprised like everyone else. He would have rushed Kim to the end of the red carpet and said to via the press "No offense Kim, but Beyonce had the best Gala dress of all time." Kanye  treats her like a baby moms and instead of giving her flowers he gave her that dress. When North West is born how are they going to explain to this young man that his mom looked like something I picked up from Joan's Fabric.

Courtesy of Im Not Obsessed.com 

How did you guys feel about Kimberly's dress? Did you understand? Can you school me, cause I did not understand.