Monday, June 3, 2013

Summer, Summer, Summertime...Now What To Do?

Summertime is here and I don't know what to do with my life. I got a second job in retail, but I think I'm fired  because when I talk to people I do not like standing around in one area and yell at people every time they come in and  if you want me to talk to randos let me have a shot or three from the bar and let me be comfortable. Also, the stadium is not the tea for me this year because $7.25/hour with credit card bills, a $90 phone bill and a clothing budget that makes my app budget my struggles So I've been thinking what should I do during the summer time and I've divided it into the "what I want to do for the summer" and "what I need to do for the summer."


1. Save up for a 2006 Volkswagen Passat a car.
At 24 years of age you would think that I would have my life pretty much in motion by now. However, after coming back to college in 2010 I partied too much. I'm talking about spending $200-$300 dollars on vodka and beer for a party. Hell, they called me the P.Diddy of Wellness 090 and I didn't even live there (shout out to Derek and Chris). My grades suffered as well as my credit score. And at 24, my dreams of even getting a car are shot.
     Contrary to popular belief, I did have a car. I got it at an auction for $500 dollars. It was a 1992 Ford something or another. If I would describe my car, lets just say that if I got Pimp My Ride to pimp out my car, they would have to get me to buy another car. My car was so outdated that it didn't have a radio, it had an Atrak player. I was going to  call my father for some tapes and ask him how it worked. The only time I drove it was when I came back with the car to my house to the auction. I was going through the motions about school, so I dropped out and moved to Hawaii. Needless to say I never got the car fixed but it sat in my driveway for five months until my mother gave it away for free. I could have at least gotten fifty bucks for it *shakes my head*.
     I really thought this was going to be the year of my car. I want a 2006 Passat with leather seats that are heated automatic drive. I would do manual transmission but it took me two years to learn automatic (#struggles) so with looking at the road, shifting gears and carrying a conversation on the phone and imessage I would have an  accident 5 minutes after taking the car off of the lot. Not to mention  I can barely do jobs that made it seem that monkeys can do (see above).

2. Writing Comedy
I'm honest with people. That's why I don't like selling clothes because I would get cursed out by a customer for telling he/she they look fat in that outfit. Or questions their intentions on why they're trying to even pick out that color. In this life and my past lives I've cut several bitches with my words. The saying is "sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me" if so why do people cry whenever I'm honest with them? And my 'book people think it's funny whenever I put a status up. Some people suggest that I do stand up. I could see myself doing it, and I could work a stage like Tyra Banks works a runway. But I have no voice control whats so ever. So talking in a microphone sound like ME YELLING AT YOU! When working at my retail job I scared several customers coming into the store. In fact, I messed up so bad that night that the only positive thing that my manager (or ex-manager?) said was "YOU HAVE GREAT ENERGY."  In fact, saying "looking for anything today at (specific store)?" and promoting the sales when they walk in, sounded like "LOOKING FOR ANYTHING TODAY? JUST TO LET YOU KNOW..." and I know for a fact I almost gave an old lady looking for her daughter a heart attack. The real kind, not the Demi Lovato song.  And I'm too afraid to get booed. I know people think I don't give no damns about how I feel about people, but I'm human and I want people to like me.

3. Internship
This year was supposed to be my year for internships. I took a step back to focus on what I want to do which was to write. I don't regret the decision, but lets just say that where I'm at in my life sucks. What would I rather be doing this summer than working two jobs where I know I won't get a decent pay and a college credit:

  • Be Lil Wayne's toothbrush. 
  • Listen to hear Taylor Swift talk sing about the many boyfriends that were trouble when they walked in. 
  • Listen to a yodel ballad on repeat from Florence and the Machine


1. To Find A New Job
It's not like I hate my jobs now, it's just there are things that I really want to do in life overall and I don't have the money to do it. Like go to my friend's unplanned/ planned wedding in Lake Tahoe. Pay off my credit card bills before I graduate in December. Not have to worry about being cheap or only getting french fries and a soda whenever I go out or when I go shopping with my gay husband. Right now, I'm looking at internships which with my degrees I can't do anything around the Lancaster, PA area unless I move to Harrisburg (not happening) or Washington, DC. Also, I'm looking towards banking and marketing. Something that can challenge and expand my mind. 

2. Start a Budget
My mother has been dropping hints whenever she does my taxes and FASFA that she wants me and my sister to move out. She always says "Dan, you're going to get *insert dollar signs* and that should be enough for you to move out for the semester." How I manage to blow my refund check at the end of the semester is beyond me. That's why I need help to budget my money. My credit report is suffering like Kimberly Kardashins swollen feet in high heels. 

Ok it's not that bad, but it'll make my accountant, if I had one, throw a Kanye inspired temper tantrum. I've always been poor, but being a product of the middle class before the stock market crashed I never had problems with money until now. 

What are you guys going to do for the summer? Comment below and maybe we can do things together. Also follow me on twitter @dan19310

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